Beating (not eating away) the blues

When I wake up with a severe attack of the blues, as I did this morning (see preceding post for details), the teenaged part of my brain tells me that food, preferably a succession of flavorful cheese, dark chocolate, buttery pastry, decadent ice cream and my beloved pumpkin-seed butter, is the answer to my woes. Sometimes, I temporarily smother my sorrows in delicious forkfuls of sugar and fat. However, I'm getting better at acknowledging the hurt and finding constructive (read: non-culinary) ways to handle it.

All kinds of people have written and spoken about their strategies for defeating the blues. While not pretending to be in any wise wise, I thought I'd share mine with you in hopes they'll help you to short-circuit the urge to eat your troubles away.

Strategy 1: Lift your spirits.

Get to work.

... getting out of the car is a good idea, too;)

What tasks make you feel accomplished? Washing the car? Doing the laundry? Taking your dog for a walk? Paying the bills? Find one or two pat-yourself-on-the-back chores and get to work. I guarantee you'll feel at least a little better once you tick them off your to-do list.

Get moving and grooving.
Will music make you merry or soothe your soul? Would a walk or a bike ride bump up your endorphins? Remind yourself of the simple pleasures that give you joy and get you moving, then choose one and go!

Get inspired.
Whom do you admire? What makes you want to be your best self? If you're facing pain or disappointment, it can help to hear how someone you admire overcame hardship; if you're spiritually drained, beauty and encouragement can refresh you. This is a good time to read poetry that makes your spirit soar, go for a hike in a gorgeous park or watch a documentary describing a cause you care about.

Go social.
Last but not least, salve your spirits in pleasant society. Catch up with family or friends, run errands, go to choir practice, book club, bible study, exercise class. It doesn't matter what you do, so long as you socialize with people whose company you enjoy.

Tickle your funny bone. (Yes, you still have one.)
This works for me, and it might lift your spirits, too. Watch a comedy, read something light, or catch up on your favourite cartoon. Today, I came across Hyperbole and a Half, a comic blog which had me in stitches.

Strategy 2: Define the problem; find the solution.

Another good way to overcome the blues is to acknowledge them and trace them to their source. Journalling is one of my favourite tactics for this because it lets me acknowledge the nasty sentiments that rush out of the dark recesses of my mind when the going gets tough. Plus, I can do it without making a fuss. (Talking to friends and family is a good way to sort this out, too, especially if you can be calm and factual about your troubles.)

This morning, for example, I took one look at myself in the mirror and decided I was a failure. My pixie cut wasn't as cute as I thought it ought to be; I'd gained five pounds in under a month; I was thirty-four and single with no partner or children; I couldn't see any prospect of a promotion in the near future; I wasn't living up to the potential I'd shown in my early twenties; my sink was full of dirty dishes. My life, I told myself, might as well be over. After moping about for longer than I care to admit, I pulled out  my trusty old journal and started to write.

Describing why I felt like a failure turned out to be just the medicine I needed. Once I could see my thoughts on paper, I realized how small and silly most of my problems were -- and if not small or silly, then manageable. There were obvious solutions to each one, to wit:

• Pixie cut: Ask my stylist to cut my hair a little differently next time.
• Five pounds of unwanted ballast: Relax. It's not that big of a deal. Eat more veggies and less starch and fat for the next few weeks.
• No other half: Get out and meet people. Lesbians, specifically.:)
• Career: Be patient and diligent. I'm planning to switch from fundraising to counselling, and I have two information sessions and one informational interview booked next week.
• Lacklustre performance: Let it go. I don't need to be the brightest star in the firmament, provided I'm contributing. Appreciate my gifts and trust that I'll shine again when the time is right.
• Dirty dishes: I washed them. Problem solved.:)

Feeling blue? Give journalling a try. The result is ten time more satisfying than the aftermath of an unnecessary snack, and there's a good chance you'll find you already know some of the answers to your problems. 

Listen to the blues: they might be telling you something important

It's spring in Vancouver: the sun's come out, and with it, the cherry blossoms. Funnily enough, spring's also brought me the blues, and I've been coping by sticking my nose between the covers of a book most days after work, and pulling my nice, warm duvet around me to keep out the cold. Naturally, coping has also meant larger meals and a sudden uptick in dark chocolate consumption...

A confession: I'm thirty-four years young and I'm experiencing a mini mid-life crisis. Rather interestingly for a lesbian who shies away from dating, I've recently decided I ought to be married with children. At times like this, I'd give so much to be a different version of me: a straight housewife with a nice husband and three lovely children -- say ages 8, 6 and 4. Of course, I'm not. Nor am I my outgoing, high-achieving alter ego, the one who speaks five languages, has lived in Beijing and rural Japan, and throws frequent dinner parties for friends and family. I'm me: pretty, quiet, charming, quick to anger and to forgive, preferring a low-key night at home or with a couple of friends to an evening ski trip or an improv comedy show.

Reality checks and unfulfilled dreams like these can be painful. The emotions they stir up can gnaw at our bellies in a way that's impossible to ignore. As with any number of unpleasant sentiments, it's easy to treat regrets like these as if they were hunger pangs, and eat to make them go away -- with the predictable result that we feel worse when the temporary high dissipates and we realize that we've medicated ourselves with food.

Let's say that you, too, have a case of the spring blues and are tempted to eat your way to temporary relief. Hold on a moment. First, the upside: the blues themselves are not necessarily a bad thing. Perhaps they're pointing you to something you need to pay attention to, as other kinds of pain do when your body is in danger. In my case, I've realized it's time to start dating and move ahead with my plans for a  new career. What about you? What might the blues, spring or otherwise, be telling you? And how can you overcome them without resorting to snacks? Read my next post to find out!